I just found a porn show called cleavagefield. no i am not watching.
watching E! true Hollywood story: curse of the lottery.. i'd probably spend all my money on blow and airplanes too..
i was more sad about losing him as neighbor on fishville than as a boyfriend
He poured all of the vodka into the sweet tea and said that tomorrow it would be called 'surprise drunk.' then we had sex.
having sex with him is like cage fighting mixed with pilates...the condoms didn't stand a chance...
You just seemed really offended whenever my cup was empty.
BRILLIANT IDEA: In honor of summer olympics we need to start a synchronized drinking team.
Doap. Just bring some lube and a slingshot. Not sure y we need the slingshot.
Don't be too mad at the guy who broke your kitchen table. Didn't get his name, but he knew all about your gay porn career. Like DETAILS...
2 things: 1) can you get hep from toilet water? And 2) do you know where we can get a new skillet for cheap?
Please tell me those aren't related.
I made rice.
Drowning in science and also vodka. Hope you're having fun.
Not gonna lie, Wednesday was the perfect day to get laid off, all I've done since is watch the Simpsons marathon
He called me 'pal' while complimenting how well I took his load on my face. I've officially been fuckbuddy-zoned.
idk he wanted to trade sex for a triple order of hashbrowns
AND YOU SAID NO?????????
So I'm buying milk, bread, yogurt & lube. Not awkward at all
Basic items
Randomize
