I texted him to clear the air a bit, apologized if I freaked him out. No reply. So I'm gonna go ahead and fuck someone in a barn tonight.
can you come get me at the bar
ill be there in 10 min
can we stop off at build a bear on the way home
I don't believe these are real court rooms. They look absolutely nothing like law and order.
Last night he tried to put me in their garbage can and then sprayed me with a fire extinguisher in their kitchen...that house is always interesting
I found a sock full of anal beads in my dryer. At least she washes them.
I think they were cool with it, they should have know if I was the host of the baby shower it was going to involve a keg and jager shots.
could you clean the juice and feathers off my bed I'm just not up for hangover cleaning.
Oh nbd. She just had sex with a divorcee. On a charter bus. At 10 a.m. On a Thursday.
Boats looked like robot pelicans and time was slow and now im on wipe out
It's awesome, he has so much more free time now that he's not screwing other girls behind my back
THIS IS A FLATMATE WARNING! The white powder next to sink is washing powder I spilled and is not meant for human comsumption. I repeat- do not digest, snort or smoke the white powder next to the sink!!!!
Her text was so long it had an arrow to expand it. You know it's bad when even your iPhone can't handle her
It was ok until his mom walked in and asked if he turned on the crock-pot...
Being an adult is fun. You can experience a break up, then go fuck someone else in the woods.
You said the best orgasm you ever had, you gave to yourself. your boyfriend looked really disappointed. so did half the room.
Randomize
