Im handcuffed to some kid i hardly know. there are no cops involved
so was this before or after i puked down the ice luge?
Hurry up. We're trading phones to prevent drunk texting.
I wouldn't really call it 'getting lucky' considering I paid her to do it.
she's sitting alone using her breathalyzer as a kazoo. help.
He's still filling me in on the details. mid-table dance i asked to go water skiing?
I think i morst likely have 95 %patulas for hands and probably i also went to eGypt with so manyfriends. We laids in the sarcaphoguses.
You sound pretty unsure about all of this.
Can an epipen be used as a tranquilizer ?
Instead of sending me a picture of his dick, he sent me a drawing of it on drawsomething. This game is getting out of control.
There's weed in my toothpaste. Explain.
I just wish the first erections of my life didn't take place at a dentists office but hey whatever I turned out alright
I barfed on the cat last night. Just wanted to share.
It's so Britney 2007, you know?
I just called my grandma crying, apologizing for being the first grandchild to have premarital sex...I'm either about to start my period or pregnant.
Looks like it rained condoms in my room last night
Randomize
