So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
i wish my penis had a tongue
ugly people sure do ruin things
I got "discovered a new religion high" last night
he ate 15 dinner rolls and nothing else. then took a shit in the bathroom came out and blamed it on his dad. i wish i was 8.
He just said he was the Jesus of alcoholics.
I really want to go out tonight but part of me wants to be able to honestly tell the judge tomorow that I didn't
Aside from the fact that there's a penis in my mouth, that's a pretty good picture of me
I feel like I wont be making enough money to support my frivilous lifestyle of beer and mcdonalds
I shouldn't trust a guy I just met with the pull out method. That's a big responsibility.
The cops said we could pay $250 or spend the night in jail and get 2 free meals. I might pee in mail-boxes more often
I think it's safe to say taking shots on the way to the emergency room was rock bottom. We're going to need to think of ways to top that between now and next new years eve...
It's all fun and games until you throw up hot cheetos in your drawer.
I'm still hammered too. I started tweeting the time at one point I'm pretty sure.
a guy messaged me on POF to ask if I knew of any places that were hiring. And was being completely deadass serious. I'm so done
Randomize
