I'm having a terrible night. Can I sleep over?
Too tired to pretend that I care : (
Just met a girl...She is complaining why on facebook you can't have more then one "open relationship"
I dont know how i feel about her from a moral standpoint...
i woke up in his bed to a "teach your baby to read" infomercial. i pray to GOD that's not a sign
surprisingly enough, it isn't that uncomfortable to have sex with a heart monitor on
Some mysterious chinese delivery man dropped off 2 free egg rolls. Clutch
any interest in drunk sledding later? if not, any interest in driving me to the hospital later?
Who the fuck superglued glowsticks to my arm.
Why is it that every study session with you turns into a hunt for drugs?
I think the lady at jack in the box started crying when we put in our order.
Yeah you'd pretty much be ruined if you broke up with a guy like that and then had to return to the dating pool
It’s like a buffet of marriages! Every option is available to you!
What's worse having drunken sex with hot married man or breaking the diet one week in?
Our entire day shift is on either molly or acid. I'm about to take two hits of the latter.
Yea.. And you'll love me a whole lot more when I start letting my vagina make all the decisions..
I visited the library for the first time in my college career tonight and I got laid. I think I'm gonna come back...
Randomize
