Where does it all go? I've busted inside of you like 10 times in the last week.
i don't even remember going to get food. i think i got gas too.
And why did 3 people fail to stop me from literally getting a piggy back ride from the bar to his apartment?!
When did it seem like a good idea to do pull ups off the balcony? After beer 5 or shot 7?
will barter weed for kareoke machine...
I wish my head, heart, dick, and nose could just agree on something for once
It's fine...I've done worse things to better people.
just peed in rthe mens room but seranaeded them with adelle the whole timee so they didnt mind
I realized after pounding back 151 and head banging into each other to "the drop" of that dub step song, that we weren't meant to have boyfriends at this point in time.
I clipped one of my extensions in his hair to give him a rat tail. What is my life?
There's a woman at the bar holding a baby with one arm and doing shots of GM with the other. The baby is crying. I have lost faith in humanity.
She said you told her you were ready to be a dad. We just got back from our purchase of the morning after pill. That took me 2 hours of convincing. No more fucking my sister.
1. Thanks. 2. No.
Told my fifteen year old cousin's friend what to sext his girlfriend last night. He was scarred for life but she fucking loved it.
I accepted my type is not "conventionally attractive" when she asked me "Him? Are you sure?" 5 times in front of him last night
I'm licking blood from my knuckles and I still haven't found my car keys..are you in town tonight?
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