Marg and I just meaowed the nat anthem. I was tenor.
'm tripping baaaaaaaaaaaaaaas
I just five second ruled a donut I dropped at starbucks, everyones staring
You kept yelling that her vagina looked like a hatchet wound.
i think you know its gunna be a bad day when it starts with throwing up into a red plastic cup
they shut off the water. shaving my legs with soda. that desperate.
I want to know him. He looks like he makes really good breakfast burritos.
Laying on my kitchen floor and the lights just got brighter... I just died or there was a power surge. Based on the amount of booze I drink both are possible.
He asked me out while I'm back in town. I have to acknowledge and honor his persistence.
Your vagina must be laced with cocaine...
You told my mom you were going to "Raw Dawg some randoms." That Drunk.
You don't know commitment until you try and waterproof a non-waterproof vibrator
Whoever labeled dysfunctional a bad thing obviously never saw this frinedship coming.
Are there any rules against fucking the hot TA?
Maybe for her....
Her problem, not mine
I believe the question is can one ever have too many vibrators?
i've hit rock bottom. Eating pringles and playing taylor swift on guitar in my underwear at 11am on a wedensday morning. Sober.
I shaved my asshole for this. That's real dedication.
Randomize