This old guy in denny's is sitting alone and he is looking at us and laughing for no reason
ok this guy next to me just sat down with a no joke, 10,000 page book, popped an addy, cracked open a red bull and opened the book to page 1.
She pulled a cheeseburger out of her purse. I have missed her so much.
Note: fake nails and fingering anus.... Not a good idea
Ive been tazing him too get him immuned. He will be unstopable.
We lit firecrackers from NYE in the fireplace and he was so passed out that he slept through it.
Right... Let's keep my vodka tinged mind focused on simple words
I have a fannypack full of condoms and acid. Let's get weird.
No he can't help me find his house he is strapped to a stretcher facing the opposite direction
I just watched my mom get dick on Skype.
That d should have definitely been an s.
I WANT BLOOD. HERS. I WILL DYE A FABULOUS PAIR OF SUEDE PUMPS RED WITH HER BLOOD.
A world without bacon flavored condoms is not one I want to live in.
is it fun? or sober?
last night you made out with a 19 year old on a bar and i woke up with a swede in my bed. lets just say that never happened.
RICK FUCKING MORANIS!!!!!
Randomize