There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
the toilet has never flushed louder then when you sneak home drunk and try to avoid your parents hearing you puke.
I have no idea what happened last night, but you're the only person I remember smashing my face into. Be honored.
I sat in the bathroom on the counter and gave out advice to all the random people that walked in
She thinks I should try and corrupt him and take his virginity. While I do love virgins, I'm a little too lazy to put in the corruption effort right now. That's a summer kinda job.
Yeah dude. Pulled out the couch and a bird flew at me. Please tell me who put a bird in my house.
Its not gay if you're best friends and there's less than an inch of dick in the picture. That's where the line is drawn
I woke up naked wrapped in my roommate's towel with one leg shaved and money thrown all over the room. Happy 21st birthday.
No, absolutely not. If you see that cunt, throw confetti or eggs at her.
That's a pretty extreme jump from confetti to eggs
WHEN DID YOU SAY YOU COME BACK BC I GOT INVITED TO A KEG WAR PARTY
All I am going to say is this: I woke up with lots of bruises on my knees from running around on all fours being a 'dinosaur'. Either girls night in went terribly wrong or terribly right.
He put a canoe in the lazy river at the water and started paddling away from security
You told him about your cats? I told his friend to put his dick in my mouth, and you talked about cats!?
I mean I'm sad it didn't work out but tbh he he can't unlick my booty hole or unbreak his headboard... He won't forget my name ever
This date is awful. He’s too boring to bang
Is porn accurate? Can I order a pizza and do the delivery boy?
Randomize
