Our friend ended up naked, bleeding, requesting we throw a couch at him cause he was convinced he could block it
We did he did.
When I say naked, I mean penis exposed. Not in boxers
You and your empty threats of no sex. Like.u.cud.hold.out.
Those balls look pretty dangerous.
there was a guy here who managed to get his head stuck in a fishbowl. no, I don't fuckin know how
enterprise is going to pick me up, im too high for this
She left scratches down my back from her wedding ring. Her husband seems like a nice guy though, judging by the scratches it had to be at least a carat.
He's like my sex unicorn. Elusive and majestic. I'll catch him, I'm baiting with patron.
Idk if you've ever had the pleasure of 1. Vomiting on a sidewalk - at 3 in the afternoon 2. Vomiting nachos or 3. Vomiting nachos out of your nose but really I do not advise any of the above.
As I fucked him you stood outside my door screaming, "I'M NOT JUDGING YOU!" over and over.
I was judging you.
He's doing his thing where I don't know if he's alive until three in the afternoon so idk
He wants to tie me naked and spread out on his table, press a vibrator to my clit and feed me ice cream.
That is my stoner wet dream!
No. Every time we go there, you end up getting high, then lost, then going home with strangers.
The album on my phone containing gross pictures to send when boys ask for nudes is now substantially larger than my normal photo album. Because I send one every night
I was just thrown into the pool and now I'm surrounded by men... You would think this is the dream but I'm just confused
That's so awful of me. Instead of comforting her I masturbated in front of my ex-boyfriend.
Randomize
