Sometimes when I whip my dick out it looks REAL impressive. This, was NOT one of those times.
why does he think he needs to feed/take me out to get some ass? we are at a bar wasting my fucking time
foreplay: 7 minutes. sex: 3 minutes. cuddling: 10 minutes. getting dressed: 5 minutes. commute: 5 minutes.
I hate to say it, but I think my pandora being Marvin Gaye love songs was the prime reason for the bj last night
quitting drinking is the number 5 new years resolution but number 4 is enjoying life more which one do you think im going to pick
We smoked a joint and talked about his parent's divorce. It was like being fifteen all over again.
third eye blind makes so much more sense now that i have a drug problem
i was that girl throwing up in the urinal. it was a dark moment in my life.
The fact that its 530pm and I'm saying to myself I should sober up since I'm at a family establishment should say enough
Yeaaah. I'm kinda wary about that guy. Does he still have that taser that he found on the train?
Nothing like a marijuana chart of usage in each country to make me understand math.
If you bring chipotle to my house i'll let you eat your burrito out of my vagina
His ass WILL be my cock's next vacation home.
I wish I had a dick so I could say shit like that.
Seriously considering modifying my computer case so it can dispense wine. I need to make a bunch of changes and reorganize it's guts anyway....
I TAUGHT HER CAT TO SIT. CATS DON'T FUCKING SIT ON COMMAND. BUT THIS ONE DID!
It's basically my crowning achievement.
Randomize