She says ass holes are for stuffing, the verb, not stuffing, the noun.
Btw, I'm really high so I apologize if anything I say gets translated into arabic.
She's mad at me cuz I told her having a fuck buddy was too much commitment.
There's cake. And donuts. And strippers. It's like 5 year old me and 20 year old me are throwing a party together...
This is great- I found hangover detoxifying bath salt online. It flushes out the alcohol. We need this.
all i could think about while he was eating me out was how pretty his eyelashes were
I woke up with no pants, someone elses shirt, but my new years crown still on. That is dedication.
Yes. I am getting trashed on an open tab while judging a karoke competition
Impressive. I approve.
Just you wait I'll be crying and puking everywhere in no time
You were face down in the punch bowl, humming the theme to jaws
That explains the stains on my shirt
And I just realized we will be at a strip club when the end of the world is supposed to happen. This is destiny
I think that's the first time Navy dress blues and a Ninja Turtles onesie have been involved in the same makeout.
Your face; I've seen enough of it for today. Go away now please.
Well the hawks lost... so, of course, the only logical course of action was a bonfire in the middle of the street.
please don't ironically join a cult
Randomize
