and then he said that the only reasonable explanation as to why I got swine flu was because all I ever do is join the bandwagon
I think we should make Neil Patrick Harris a permanent part of our role playing.
Definately going to wake up wondering what happened to the other half of my lip.
... there are chew marks on my license. I have no idea.
Did I crawl through the hotel lobby all the way to our room?
He turned me down because he was still doing his taxes.
They poured beer (3 cans) down the toilet so bubbles can be drunk in fishy heaven
pain. pain everywhere. this is why throwing yourself at concrete is a bad idea.
My ex wife just asked to go over our divorce papers and for sex in the same text
Woke up to my asscrack filled with melted Reese's Pieces. Halloween parties are so weird here man
We're following a guy carrying a door for beer pong at his place..join us when you are deemed sober enough to leave the hospital.
.It's like gods test of willpower against vaginal comfort
Banging to Billy Joel pandora is like russian roulette. But I made him cum to Let It Be so I we both walked away victors
mate iv just woke up in the garden. either help me inside or bring out my vodka
Sorry. I was preoccupied thinking about penises
Randomize
