I got into my dads silver toyota in the back seat to get picked up and 2 mins later I asked my dad when are we leaving, then an old mexican woman turned around. wrong toyota I'm guessing.
Hold on. She's wrapped herself in toilet paper and is scaring the dog.
Too many margaritas?
In case this wasn't clear when i said being his wingman was "hopeless", his date walked out on him when he poured a beer on his head trying to shotgun it
chugging beers on the train. people are staring. I would be offended if it wasn't 8:30
New level of high: If I could bathe in my salsa right now I would.
I'm laying in the fetal position on the floor of my kitchen eating potato salad with my fingers. Please come over with some real food and keep me company.
He said it. He actually said "yes it's in".
its just been over 12 hours, and i`m dying, don`t know how i`m supposed to survive the holidays sexless
You know it's a good weekend when you wake up on Sunday questioning your sexuality.
When Pony by ginuwine plays I pretty much just grind on the nearest penis.
while i am personally glad that we met...i feel like for society as a whole it was a bad thing
I wrote him a note at the end of the final. I'm hoping I can flirt my way in to an A or B
Honestly, I am sitting in my room watching Ciara videos and thinking I am super jealous of how she rides it.
Unless you want to see me masturbate, I think skype is a no go for now.
Me and my boss just exchanged pictures of our bongs and such...I don't know I feel about this
Randomize