but it happened after you broke up with me and before we made up.
I gave her the chance to be interesting and she failed. So then I gave her a chance to be slutty and she failed at that too.
Theres this tee in the mall and it says all girls just wanna have safe sex. U make me think thats a lie
Make me a promise>>> if you ever see the brats from that tv show NYC Prep walking around, you will trip them, and you wil throw drinks on them
I don't get why Lindsay Lohan doesn't just blame her bad behavior on her twin sister from the Parent Trap. I mean nobodys seen her since.
seriously who else gets carried home puking from a fucking mary kay party?
Just don't let me fall on anything that can be broken. Unless its a dick
I beat my mom's friend's boyfriend in a vodka chugging competition. Our generation FTW.
Oh man, are we repeating last 4th of July?!
That shouldn't even be a question, it's a tradition now. Hope your manhood is ready.
I don't understand why you aren't on this trip all I do is smoke weed drink beer and get fingered
There is absolutely a 0% chance my hips will make it out of this twerking business fully functional
I had sex in a panda mask the other night.
Just please don't close your legs while I'm down there again. I don't want my death to be labeled as "Head crushed while giving an individual cunnilingus".
seriously i don't trust him. he fed me a hot dog out of a crock pot and gave me moonshine dashed jager bombs.
I know she’s pissed I fucked her husband, but I didn’t know he was married until after I blew him at Legoland
Randomize
