I wouldnt endorse that guy if he was walking in a walkathon to raise money for a disease i had
he said i was the most charming throwing up drunk person hes ever taken care of. so of course i had sex with him.
i remember too much of last night for it to have been successful
I just figured you know how to drive a boat and I know how to get drunk. What can go wrong
hotel security told us you walked into the hotel with blood all over your dress, weren't wearing any underwear and were escorted back by three men who were believed to be "homosexuals".
Sadness tears and throw up everywhere
you have a wonderful penis attached to someone I'm having a lot of problems with right now
well you're talking about the girl who after 4 years, several relationships and several fuck buddies, has yet to have sex in an actual bed
Why would you hook up with someone whos known for peeibg in someones mouth
my mom was by far the drunkest one there. best impromptu wednesday afternoon party ever
Gotta get new sheets. ..I fucked the satin off mine.
So the doorbell rang while we were banging, and I'm pretty sure the pizza man saw my dick. But hey, we got pizza.
Well I passed out before 4:20 on 4/20 so I deem it a failure AND a success.
You tried to order fondue take-out.
From Taco Bell.
COME HERE AND I WILL SUCK YOUR COCK UNDER THE LIGHT OF THIS BEAUTIFUL ELECTRICITY
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