Come on the kid is gayer than me
Like the straightest thing he could do right now is take it up the butt
All the good ones are taken. All that's left is the Harry Potter geek or the asshole in the corner. I think I'll settle for Harry Potter.
I knew my chances of getting laid had increased after she walked into my room and yelled "DICK TIME"
Prepare for tons of dick. I mean dick by the bucket loads. Waterfalls if cock.
Dude. There's gotta be an article in Cosmo about it cause I've had three different girls tongue tickle my brownie this month.
I'm so sick
I would imagine. You did most of your drinking for brazil last night.
That and I think I got food poisoning from sharing nachos with that homeless guy..
I have to answer enough questions about you, I don't need your uterus tossed in the conversation.
Breakfast Clubbing as Juggalos. I can feel our IQs in freefall.
I actually have to watch Breaking Bad to make me feel better about my choices last night.
Quick question. How did my clothes end up in your room on your bed and I end up outside your room naked on your couch?
someone needs to name a hurricane after you
I make him buy me all the extremely expensive high end Mac cosmetics I desire. Wear it then let him cum on my face. I am fucking glamorous.
In your alcohol circus, can my act be juggling men? Let's be real, I can juggle multiple dick buddies better than a professional
BTW, does Anne know that we used the lipstick she is currently wearing to was used to write the word "ASS" on my ass cheeks last night?
I just blew thrown up hashbrowns out my nose. That's the level of this hangover.
Randomize
