Wine + wine + wine + wine + bud light = puke.
You yelled "bananas are an excellent source of pottasium!"4 times in the middle of class. how do you not remember?
I don't even know what potassium is.
i love beer. I convinced myself that I'm going to ace the exam tomorrow. I can't even do that when I actually study.
You were running around with scissors offering people free haircuts.
if that dog is afraid of alcohol then he's no dog of mine
his profile picture is a blurry one of him holding a beer. i recognized him instantly.
Can I have my ID back now or are you using it to crossdress again?
He managed to get his pants on, so the cop just sat there facing us with his lights shining in the car. I made shadow puppets.
I totally just stopped for a booty call on the way to my parents for easter....good friday is an understatement
I have grass duct taped all over my body
I'm dressed in all sequins still at 9:30 in the morning and the worst part is that I actually still fit in in Vegas
I've decided to become a librarian so I can drunkenly quote The Mummy and have it be legit.
Do you think you can chase a shot with chicken soup?
I can't base my relationships off of good dick and dogs.
It doesn't matter how nice the shirt you wore to the bar was, you still shouldn't have worn it to a job interview
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