I need help removing her.
Care to explain to me why theres a baby food jar filled with semen in my fridge? or why its labeled as unicorn sweat?
Just painted my nails at the bar... I may be getting too comfortable here.
At what point did we decide It was a good idea t have a wheelbarrow race in the parking lot?
I vaguely remember walking down the highstreet with a plate of K offering lines to passers buy. I sold a line to a taxi driver.
explain the broken jalepenos in my underwear drawer?
Im sitting on the exxon bathroom floor, idk if its healthy but it sure is cold
If you're fucking that other dude, I'll take the sloppy seconds. I don't care.
I'll keep you from getting pregnant and you keep my papers gramaticallly correct
So our trip to Disney World ended in the three of us stripping at a gay club in orlando.
Ran into him again last night, stole his glowstick and walked away. The glowstick mountain in my room keeps growing.
There's a guy in a life size dick costume, and two guys with white shirts that are each half if a pair of breasts in a red bra lol. They came separate but when they saw each other there was some titty fucking in the street, it's only 11
The fact I have to evaluate my choice between tequila and fruity pebbles is a clear image of my life right now
Started mixing booze directly into the 2 liters and carrying them around. Mixing less often, and now kind of weightlifting,so double effecient.
Want to help me interview candidates to replace my Cub/Boy Toy when he leaves for grad school next month?
Randomize