the sham wow guy got arrested for beating up a hooker.
Sometimes when I whip my dick out it looks REAL impressive. This, was NOT one of those times.
I don't think you'd be able to understand Inception if you weren't high...
My god. We'll be gay porn millionaires.
It's going to be so weird waking up tomorrow morning fully rested completely sober and not covered in piss or bruises.
just found out I was hugging strangers at the bar last night. there's photographic evidence. I know none of them
You thought you were drunk? I woke up at 6 o'clock this morning with a cheeseburger in my left hand a drink in my right with my window half way down. it was raining.... fml
I didn't know. I guess I really haven't had that much time for drinking lately. I mean, outside drinking at home/work.
I remember caressing his hands asking him if he moisturized, then i proceeded to put his hands on my face
Is is gay if I donloaded Grinder to see if my roommate is gay?
I accidentally sent my dad a very explicit Star Wars fanfiction and he replied with "That was great!"
Emojis can't explain what he felt when that ass dropped
Why the fuck are you playing with legos?
Why the fuck are you questioning me?
I just got a text from a stranger offering to shave my asshole. I've been sober and out of town for a week, are you using my number as a dial-a-dumping again?
she has no right to get mad at us for drinking during the wedding. she's the one that chose the bridesmaid dresses with pockets.
Randomize
