Who keeps a bong in their car??
Kids who graduated high school two weeks ago.
we did it on the carpet and she just yells out "OH. MY PSORIASIS".
On a scale of 1 to last weekend, how hungover are you?
There's a sign at Bashas for 30% off of 6 bottles of wine in Friday. That seems like a personal challenge.
You kept saying "sir officer" which would have been polite and helped you if it wasn't a female. She was pissed.
We can't bring brittanys dog so we are getting high and getting in my bathtub I think it's pretty safe
You know, there is no convenient place for your beer when you are on shrooms taking a shower.
Drinking gin at a party, riding a giant inflatable walrus all around the living room.
We found her. She's owling on the sink in the bathroom.
hey if you're going to the hospital do you wanna pick me up a taco on your way back
maybe if I avoid him long enough we could skip the talking part of "we need to talk"
Btw there's a hedgehog in my room. Don't get it high
Please don't fuck the professor. We both know that won't end well.
Stop inviting Kevin over. The dickless wonder started playing some strange Sci-FY music and speaking an alien language and the girls split.
Upstairs definitely just had sex while I wrote you love poetry. That was a fun experience 🤷🏻♀️
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