the red head has a bf
just because there's a goalie doesn't mean u can't score
I need to go to a fraternity... my boobs are telling me to.
DRUNK CANOEING
Please text me if you survive.
LAND HO BITCH
I wanna die of smoke inhalation. In a huge teepee. Or one of those big things kids in kindergarten have that you throw up in the air then sit inside of.
So this is where people who peaked in high school come to drink?
Dude they're making a condom for people who have no feeling in their penises that will make them able to have an orgasm. I love science
I woke up in a bath tub and my face was sore and it wasn't because of you, I was impressed
Running my fingers through my hair was like that scene in Patch Adams where the old lady got to swim in a pool of pasta. I love Molly.
I'm excited I love mornings when I'm not sober
Dinner at 5, shrooms at 10.
I just asked my mom if I could be the drunk realitive at the reunion. She said as long as I'm not obvious.
Oh well, he'll live. He has a hand and a penis.
Don't get mad at me now, you have my car and all the doughnuts
I am putting clothes on to go find a brownie
In my experiences, brownies are better naked.
duddde i wasn't even home last night and someone elses clothes are on my floor and there glow sticks everywhere?!
Randomize
