you still trying to smash that chick?
it's a losing battle and she kinda sucks. been busy with school so not getting midweek drunk - she's nearly unbearable sober
who let me buy 6 packs of big league chew? and eat them all? thats not cool
This girl in my class is wearing a sweatshirt that says "LEAD ME NOT INTO TEMPTATION" ahaha I almost just laughed out loud. We could never be friends
you assured me you'd make it home safe because your pizza rolls were waiting up for you.
Doing blow at 6am to "wake myself up for clinicals" was a baaaaad idea
during a bj, his alarm went off and he said "At the buzzer"
Like what kind of adult things? Whats more adult than drinking at 2pm on a monday?
Her brother is definitely not gay. I hooked up with him when she was sleeping.
I just threw up on the floor. And we're gonna fuck on the beer pong table, so keep everyone upstairs.
I come bearing gifts of whiskey and vagina
You know what would make the espn body photos even better? If anyone knew who any of those fucking athletes were. That, and maybe not feature Gary Player.
you left your anal beads in the dishwasher
I never said it was inaccurate, I said I hate you.
he made that chewbacca noise when he came. like father like son i guess.
Just once, can I please come back to a room that doesn't smell like beer and cum?
Randomize
