Got a toothbrush?
Sex tip #67: Jizz in the eye is very near the equivalent to pepper spray. Not recommended for pleasure enhancement.
Girl next to me just said "as a guy I used to sweat but not I don't. it's awesome" Oh. My. God.
im giving 12 year olds life advice. this is probably illegal somewhere.
yeah but it's new years. they should arrest people for being sober that day.
She made out with the kickboxers bf. She was just asking to get kicked in the head. In the middle of the bar.
bah. we'll see. don't give yourself a boner of false hope.
You didn't even properly utilize my pigtails.
Well when you get back to your computer, there's a nice explanation of pansexuality on your Skype.
It feels like you stuck your dick in a fire and then branded the inside of me.
We're you guys there last night when everyone started chanting "Nacho Steph"? Someone picked me up, carried me to the nacho cheese and made me do a nacho cheese stand.
There they were doing the deed on the beach, looked like two seagulls fighting over a chicken bone.
We just fucked like crazy and now I'm dipping chips in macaroni & cheese. I feel completely accomplished. This may be the best day ever.
If only I could bank my drunk hookups for a sober IOU.
low point of the night : a cop just busted out laughing at me.
Randomize