omg kevin jonas gave his bride a glass slipper..could he be any gayer then he is now
he is so gay. he makes clay aiken look straight. what is wrong with the lady that married him? kevin must be envious of her balls
My ATM looks so different sober.
i took it, then realized you live 3 ours away. but if you start driving now, im almost positive I'll still be hard
slow down on the beer.. we don't need another pentabong projectile hot dog incident
The assistant vp has a bottle of wine on his desk & I have a feeling my boobs will be making an appearance today.
I'm beginning to think the only reason I get laid anymore is girls are fantasizing sleeping with my dad...
For u too. Could be years before u have a finger in ur ass
By the way, playing "guess who I had sex with last night" was a great way to start a Thursday, or any day
I got home and laid by the toilet and then alexa laid in the bathtub and sang the preamble while kayla held my hair
We can see it once so I can see the whole movie, then I'll go see it with him so I know when the boring parts are and I can have sex with him during those parts
I knew as soon as he opened a beer with his teeth to shotgun it that I was going to sleep with him. I'm never going home.
The neighbor just yelled bring me back that big red alien penis.
The girl neighbor.
I accidentally left my shirt at my booty calls house. He washed it & hung it up for me in his closet. I can't decide if that's sweet or creepy
Wanna get drunk and make some bad decisions?
Are you calling me a bad decision?
The progression was banging a stripper banging an unemployed stripper banging a sexual entrepreneur quarantining with benefits totally fucking whipped. Get it right dude
Randomize
