so... how was it???
he had bart simpson sheets. he had itunes on shuffle and "don't worry be happy" started playing when he took his boxers off. sad to say i was neither worried nor happy
We all just poured out a sip of our drinks for you. One for our pussy whipped homie.
Just invented new drinking game watching Hocus Pocus... everytime they say "virgin" wetake a shot and yell out "to j****"
He ate me out and then left in a hurry and shouted "Sorry to dine and dash" as he left my house
My vag wants to play a game of hungry hungry hippos with your cock.
Throwing up while listening to pandora radio. Don't tell me my life doesn't have theme music.
He just did blow off my nipples. He's not serious about his girlfriend.
He started to lose his balance halfway through his "commencement speech" at the top of the staircase. The rest is bloody, profanity-laiden history.
He stole the megaphone off an ATM then we drove around so he could tell people not to jaywalk.
currently wearing a football players overly sized underwear. discovered a shot count on my leg. I'm a tank hahahhh
Well I think it's fate. Considering march is my fave month because it's my birthday and st. Patrick's day. And his name is Patrick. I'm sleeping with him all through march. No question.
You would only karaoke to Spanish songs, but sang with the accent of the french candle stick in beauty and the beast.
He puked in the middle of it and I still wasn't disappointed.
You ripped the leaves off the top of a pineapple then rubbed the rough skin part all over your face saying "this is how you mate with other species"
You kept crying and I couldnt help but laugh at you, I was really high though.
Randomize
