dude..why do i always have to pick up the kitty litter after you drink?
I sware she could use her own nose as a dildo.
rainy day on campus = new personal fetish for girls in booty shorts and colorful rain boots
I'm taking child development now so if you get pregnant i can raise your child no worries
I feel like I bought a front row ticket to watch her screw up her life
he got his own cum in his own eye. TWICE. how do you make that mistake again?
I had a great penis washing session in the sink before I left. Washed off all the bar and green beer
She was so morning drunk she asked the lady at brueggers for a bandaid and my self respect back
Sometimes things go your way and sometimes you get hit on by a fat drunk girl.
He wheeled me around walmart in a cart, and stole at least 30 dollars of junior mints fpr me. Best date ever.
Dude, he threw a pool chair off of an 8 story building. It was a successful night I'd say.
But really- as the voice of your vagina I am BEGGING you to do it. If not for yourself than for your poor innocent puss
I just masterbated to the home shopping channel...what have I become...
I need to be her Aladdin, and show her the world. The sex world.
FUCK WHALES
Randomize
