She said so on her MySpace, so it's gotta be true.
The highlight of my Saturday night was singing along to the sound of music alone in my room.
Every night before bed, when I used to say prayers, now I just think to myself 'freshman sluts. Soon'
while you laid on the ground I poured water into your mouth out of dog bowl some random guy walks by and said now that's what I like to see.
On the plus side I got to ride in a fire truck and I didn't have to blow anybody for it
I show up hung over with mcdonalds. Why wouldn't he have sex with me? It's a fucking leap year...
Just played slippy cup. Flip cup plus slip n slide. What did you do with your fourth of july?
On a completely unrelated note I think I have carpal tunnel
Again, totally unrelated
I have been drunk every time I've gone to mexico. I do not remember mexico.
He fucked me in his tour van, I feel like an official groupie.... Except I don't even listen to his band.
Interesting. All i can really say is humanoid shaped doritos bags melting very slowly
He fucked me in one of the back rooms at the club then gave me an altoid. I have mixed feelings about it still.
I woke up with a bunch of jolly ranchers and an eight ball in my purse. Successful
Looking back, we probably shouldn't have chased alcohol with more alcohol
DID YOU OR DID YOU NOT, PEE IN MY FUCKING TRASHCAN?!
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