Plan B is the new Plan A
Most the numbers in my phone are mistakes. It's a virtual graveyard of people I should never pick up for.
this guy had a colored tattoo of Chucky on his leg, whatever drugs he does, i want them
Got hereat 8. Had 6 beers 2 shots and a game of diZZY BATOS
Just came during my obgyn appt. I need to get laid.
It's official, I need to start putting my vagina's needs before my own.
When did I go from having sugar daddies to being one? And does it count as a tax write off?
I'm not sure I can continue to condone our having sex in all of your friends' beds
Would jacking off with Benadryl cream be good or bad for the poison oak on my dick?
I'd say it's his fault for never running us through proper protocol for "catching your RA in the middle of him banging some girl"
Hey I can officially say I made out with a drug lord.
I'm not a whore anymore. I gave up 90% of my women for you. I'm a 4-5 woman kind of guy now.
Calm down I'm not kidnapping the bartender
I'm setting goals and achieving them. I'd say I'm quite mature for my age.
You're goal was to fuck him and you don't even remember it.
we didn't have sex though. because i have the will power of an ox.
Randomize
