dude you need to get laid
me?
no, the other guy who hasn't been laid in 7 months
oh I thought you were talkin about me
wait
So pretty much, I was trying to piece last night together and remembered a point where I was pointing to you heart then touching your face. I'm not sure that I ever translated that to "I like your personality better than your looks" but that's what I meant
I totes stole your whore crown.
With great power comes great responsibility.
I think I found my soulmate. This guy in front of me is yelling about getting laid while holding two beers and texting. I think this is love.
oh great. kentucky is ranked #1 in the country for child abuse. go us.
note to self... there IS such a thing as having too many birthday shots...
I think off duty cops drove me home. I may have been hitchhiking
Bisexual Viking-cowboy hybrid is at the bar again
Dibsssss
looking at my texts from you makes me want to throw up in my pants
I feel my soul being ripped out of my eye sockets
It is completely possible to eat beef jerky sexually.
He put chocks of wood in front of his doors to stop me from leaving. I'm not nearly drunk enough for that to be appropriate behaviour.
There is nothing worse then the feeling after you've held in farts all night..
What's his name?
Banged a guy with 2 broken arms once. Top that
Dude, she was there with her husband and I was there with my wife. Of course we banged in the bathroom.
Randomize
