They want to listen to Lady Gaga while they puke.
On a positive note, new entry in my phone as 'HOT ASS, DOWN TO FUCK'. idk if its a boy or girl tho.
Update, its a couple
Dude you has no fucking this poptart
What?
I dont know to explain this.
It seems like every guy I've hooked up with all end up hanging out together, its like a cult.
He was going down on me as I discovered a spaghetti-O on my boob. Its been a while since I faked it.
They are stoned and trying to learn sign language together. It's like watching a chimp waving at itself in a mirror.
barely 48 hours and I've done the dirty on both of my roommates beds before they've even slept in them
My roommates said duck dynasty was stupid ... toto i don't believe we're in kansas anymore.
Apparently he walked into the room and started yelling at some huge hairy dude to get out of my room. Except it wasn't my room... Because he was on the fourth floor.
I think my AA sponsor just booty called me.
Now: to brush my teeth, put on my grandma slippers and earplugs, masturbate to 50 Shades and then PTFO
I think I got a sinus infection from puking out my nose on st. Patricks day #thisis26
WTF was I supposed to tell them? "hi mom and dad, this is some rando I met on the internet. please ignore the noises that will be coming from my bedroom for the next 60-90 minutes. kthxbye."
the night literally screamed "cock and ball torture"
The only thing I remember is the 300 pound man breaking ur railing from sliding down it at 3 am. Must of been a good night.
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