What did you even date her?
because emotionally unstable girls are great in bed.
no. the fact that it's halloween completely overrides the fact that it's sunday. youre going out whether im dragging your boring ass or not.
i just wasnt prepared to have the baby of one of two french firemen. threesomes are too confusing.
Put cigar in mouth backwards. Plz remind to check for scar in morning, can't feel it now. Screwdrivers are like morphine.
Got robbed by knifepoint. Then got sympathy Bj. I might have to walk down Austin ave drunk every weekend
I can coach you back to consumption. Think of it kinda like Rocky II.
I've thrown up in front of nearly every customer we've had today.
sea world and a strip club? BEST DAY EVER!
Only you would have to block the fucking governor of Tennessee from reading your tweets
I think my ph in my vagina is actually off from the lack of sex I've had this break compared to finals week.
I responded with "neat-o burrito" to his SEXT...he tried so hard and I just panicked.
Only I could go on a date with one guy, have a beer with a different guy and go home with the guy im trying to avoid. I have a talent or a problem.
I AM A GOOD PERSON AND THEREFORE I DESERVE QUALITY DICK!
He started humming a moment like this when I was taking off his pants.
I guess you could say the date didn’t go so well since I was drunkenly Snapchatting with my ex by the end of it.
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