We named our party play list daddy issues
he was uncircumcised...I HAVE NOT YET REACHED THAT SKILL LEVEL OF DICK
Dude, Taco Bell gave me a free fiesta potatoes when I won a bet on wether I could fit the entire rim of a cup in my mouth.
We are going to be Siegfried and Roy for Halloween and you are going to be the tiger.
her best friend is in town and she told me that they used to fool around when they were drunk and I'd have to "help keep that from happening"
you motherfucker
When you get here, kick me in the balls. It's really important. - I'll explain later.
If you haven't seen a huge black man in tiny red snowflake shorts that barely cover his dick, then you don't know what I'm going through.
So what's today's forecast for the female rollercoaster you've been riding?
I watch one musical on Netflix, and the "Suggested for you" section is literally almost the entire gay movie category. I feel profiled, and netflixs' accuracy about my sexuality is both impressive and offensive.
He sent me a picture of his dick as a snake, I'd say things are going great.
Just witnessed some guy throw his fake eye at his dad's face. Actually, he whipped it at him.
Donald Trump looks like someone photoshopped hair onto a dick pic.
I don't work there anymore. If they had Prince themed dildo parties i never would have quit
Just deepthroated a hot dog. Thinking of you
Yea and there’s destruction when we’re together, mostly of our livers but W/e
Randomize