doesn't he have a GF?
that just means you have to try harder.
i didn't have to try TOO hard, just told him i didn't want to know his name or...
i'm so hungover...i might vomit in a handbag instead of selling them
Ohh the wonderful, yet disgusting things she can do with her hair
Medical school killed my enjoyment of porn. Hard to keep a boner when you're diagnosing all the actor's STDs and skin disorders.
Im in a bar and I just invented a scrabble drinking game. People are cheering. It's like the universe has aligned itself.
apologized to him about 10 times for being drunk. told him about 15 times that he was "really pretty"
Are you absolutely against sleeping in your car? Because i've done that before.
He is so amazingly handsome. I just wanna fuck every shred of decency out of him.
His thanks his mom for not having an abortion at his wedding toast. I love frat weddings.
I come bearing gifts of whiskey and vagina
He came up to me looked at my tits said they were huge, rated them a 7 and then asked if girls really do masterbate. To make it better, he put his hand up to my face and said his penis is longer than my face...
We were tripping too hard to figure out to tell him where we were so we sent a picture of me laying outside the tent saying "find us"
I slept awesome next to you. You're like an electric blanket that I can have morning sex with.
Tequila is never to blame. We all make good choices under tequila
my gynecologist gave me a high 5 for not getting any STD's since my last visit and said "Way to go Annabeth!" you have twenty seconds to get to my level
Randomize
