Last night I fell down in the street (I think in someone's vomit), cut my knee up, lost my moms necklace and my license, and had to walk back to the hotel.
Two girls are now jumping in the ocean naked at 10 PM...and I was just starting to hate Ocean City
It was some time between the gurgles of her blowing me to us throwing up in the same bucket afterwards that I realized we would be doing this a lot.
That penis you're staring at is the penis of heartbreak. Stay away. It will break your heart AND keep you away from other penises. BACK. OFF. THE PENIS.
i looked up and she was looking over the stall watching me pee and told me to unlock the door. that dedicated to sucking my dick.
I used the picture of my mom and I doing blow job shots in Vegas in the presentation for my Spanish final. Graduation here I come.
i woke up this morning and saw her in my bed and i said to myself, I think I might have a drinking problem.
I think I am calling out of work due to a hangover. I'm 96% sure there ISN'T tampon stuck inside me.
All of her cloths were on our coffee table this morning. The only things she left with last night were her shoes and Scott
Well watching will be involved...it'll just most likely be of me licking your penis instead of me trying to understand how Hans Solo goes up against the Galactic Empire...
First time for everything: started posting a Facebook comment, decided I'm not quite sober enough. Progress.
We were at dinner and dad asked me to pass the salt and I suddenly remembered doing body shots when I was blacked out last weekend.
congratulations on joining the accidental bisexual club
She fucked my eyebrows.. I've never had that done before.
Wait... Plucked, or Fucked?
Fucked, but I understand your need to clarify
My debit card was between my ass cheeks when i woke up. i vaguely remember putting it there for safe keeping
Randomize
