and next time when you feel me up, do it right
she thought don quixote was a type of tequila.
I love online classes. Spent the last part of my lecture taking apart a teabag and filling it with weed.
recycled a plan b box. kill a baby. save a tree.
she said she was living bicuriously through me.
I woke up alone at my apt. On the floor with the door wide open, but still. Success.
I have a date tonight... Like a real date... Not the kind where you just go over to his house and have sex and then never speak again.
On a lighter note, the guy I gave a lap dance to then fell asleep on his crotch just facebook friend requested me..
I think online classes were designed around the concept of day drinking.
If you wondered to yourself today, "did Sarah break her bathing suit strap and flash a pool full of children," the answer is yes.
I have come to the conclusion that my perfect boyfriend is a cardboard cutout of Link with a dildo attatched. Also, Merry Christmas.
im sleeping with a therapist...so you can talk to me.
Do you think casino weekend will remind us once again that we in fact are not mature enough to be this old?
So you're mad that I let you go home with the guy with soft hands but yet you can't understand that I was just trying to help you
I'm just going to use my debit card. I feel bad buying pizza with the money I stole from my roommate...so I'm going to put it in my piggy bank.
Randomize
