After 10 years all I have gotten is one bra pic, at this point I should be able to draw your cervix from memory
You drew a lightning bolt on your eye and stomach in eye liner and made me sing Poker face with you in harmonies. I never knew you were still a music major when you were drunk.
I think I am the only girl in the world who would be proud of these scars from rug burn.
He said that if more girls show up hes not going to ask ages... Spoken like a true sex offender
There is a limo involved. Man up, and make yourself puke. Its only one more night of blacking out.
She called to say she's single and blow job season is back.
I'm skyping with my parents and reading Cosmo articles on giving great head. I'm on a roller coaster that only goes up, baby.
He passed out with the ball in his hand so no one could play beer pong without him.
It was like you were trying to communicate only you were using every letter of the alphabet but in no order and in a different language
No like you fell onto the fence. I don't even know how you got into the fenced in area.
Being at this stripclub only reinforces how single I am. And I was *just* becoming okay with that.
Just got flashed by an entire bus of girls in school uniforms. We then had to wait beside each other at a light. It was awkward.
What should I say back?
Well, how do you want the conversation to go?
Straight into my pants.
I sleep better at night when I win things. I never really weep for others.
We found him sitting in the back of the club crying into a strippers lap. She told us he missed his pet frog and to come back later.
Randomize
