Remember when I use to call my dick 'the pendulum'
wtf?
It is now the artist formerly known as 'insideyourgirlfriend'
Dude if you're in another zip code it doesn't count
You don't understand. I'm not like you.
As im putting my laundry in the machine, i find a solo cup and a pong ball that i signed babe ruth
I'm not sure, 7-8, the last bit was a rush of at least three blended together. Basically you fucked me so stupid that I can't even recall the number of orgasms.
So you know, I'm making that my facebook status.
College freshman give noticeably better blowjobs by the 5th week of the semester.
My drug dealer is making me hot tea during the snowstorm...I'm a fan.
I love you so must. You as do fraty. You are truly my veste breakable (ties I wtf racket Andover). Luce you. Have a safe drive bio dough failover.
It's a "party harder or raise your standards" kind if night.
Thank you for listening to my rant about tacos.
If everything else in my life fails, at least I just had one of my top orgasms
Maybe snorting K off penises isn't healthy
I'm on my third roll of toilet paper. Today can fuck right off.
Also my roomate used some of my condoms so she gave me her hummus. Great trade
Gov of Georgia is going to allow massage therapists to return to work.
Gives a new meaning to 'Happy Endings'.
You ever fart so hard it made you cum a little? A "friend of mine" wanted to know.
Randomize