I'm in that akward stage between jailbait and cougar
I'm drinking reisling in a paper cup by myself in the garage.
So she comes up to me at the end of the night and asks me if I going to take her home and fuck her. I pretty much had to right?
you had an obligation.
Just smoked a bowl with the exterminator. I think my day is more productive.
All I know is I woke up next to her beside the toilet
You yelled "hold my dick" before you tackled the guy away from the dj and two random girls moved to actually hold it, then argued about it. I want that whore aura!
I just hope when I turn 21, it doesn't tank my entire semester.
all a girl really needs is a few good pair of leggings and a drug dealer that delivers.
Until you can top getting paid to have women tell you to check out their ass, my job will remain better than yours
i was sitting in the back of a squad car completely stoned watching airplanes take off
He sent me a pic stitch collage of all the tit pics I had sexted him this month. It was so sweet!
He did 5 five hand stand push ups and took off his shirt for a barbarian flex. Some girl took off her shirt and threw it at him
Socially acceptable to sleep in a booth in the library? Its not finals but I dunno if I can make it back to south. Too drunk.
Hangover and judgement, the breakfast of champions.
its a comptetion of fuckups and im HERE TO WIN
Randomize
