I totally understand Scottish logic. No underwear+skirt=great
you could play connect the dots with the people ive fucked in this room
I didn't want to talk to him so I just started telling him how important Jesus was to me
All I can tell you is you will need a rain slicker for tonight's festivities. Any clothes underneath would be highly frowned upon as well.
Very hungover, bought a newspaper and found my shorts from last night in the machine.
im drunk. people are steering their children away from me. whatever it is that you called for, I assure you that I don't care. have a good night
Bombed my 8 a.m. exam and the liquor store doesn't open till noon. Drinking unfinished beers from last night till they open.
It felt like Party Santa dropped by and gave us two more 18-packs.
I just watched how this is made for an hour because I was tooo high to remember what they were making. it was like a prize at the end.
I responded with "neat-o burrito" to his SEXT...he tried so hard and I just panicked.
All I'm saying is that if he knows his wife walks around naked during the day, he shouldn't bring a friend home for lunch and show up unannounced.
EW HE LOOKS LIKE SOMEONE'S DAD
They think I'm one of them. I'm about to get drunk in a Santa suit and bust down the door singing Christmas carols.
Bro, that'd be the third dick I've taken down in the office.
Wow first he impregnates you then he won't send you the sex tape you made together? Where has chivalry gone?
Randomize
