Then he told me he was 40. I'm not sure if I have enough Daddy issues to go for it
Fist pumping is hard when country music is playing FYI but I am committed
I think I'm going to inject the gummy vitamins with vodka
I'm glad you're using your medical degree for some good for once
What do you mean you don't pregame your bikini waxes?
I have no recollection of sleep choking you
We literaly had to peel your fingers off the jose cuervo bottle and lock it in someones room
Mass texted booty calls to all the guys I've hooked up with this year to commemorate the end of the semester.
they're doing drop shots of Jager into red wine. i don't want to be on that level
It was like you were trying to communicate only you were using every letter of the alphabet but in no order and in a different language
Cute underage boy is in my house.
OH MY GOD. DON'T DO ANYTHING. WHY IS HE IN YOUR HOUSE.
There are people taking shots out of a turtle shell.
I'd say things got weird when I started doing lines of molly in the box.
The family next to you was not pleased
Last time we had an ultimatum like that, things went very far south. I'm down, but it's your turn to wake up in a hospital.
We made a pact to go to the nursing home together... that way we could stay high till the bitter end. Do you not remember?
I've got 3 hot dudes surrounding me. It's the Bermudick Triangle.
Randomize
