We had sex in the ocean but the tide took our clothes away too. Its no fun walking back to the dorm wearing only a beach blanket between you.
you will always have a special place in my vag
I think hes settled down now. He's just licking the walls and the windows.
My niece just called my sister in law a teabagger. I love NPR and it's corrupting influence on small children
as we waited for a manager to come open the door that we broke while having sex on the wall, we decided to go round two in the hallway before he came back.. god i love hotels.
It's one of the many facets of my drunken alter egos. I'm like substance abuse batman.
She had one drink in her cleavage and another in her hand. She kept rotating between the two by leaning backward and then sipping the one in her hand.
they wouldn't let me take the pitcher of beer on the ferris wheel
I don't even know where to begin....there's queso sauce and public hair stuck to everything
You're about to fuck a guy with a sweatshirt tied around his waist like a mensurating 13 year old. Get your priorities straight, you're graduating tomorrow.
Juss got out of jail; shes still in there tryin to sing her abc's backwards bc the cops neva asked her too... Whebever she gets to t she starts singin the tequilla song
oh and apparently my boobs are named "have no fear" and "plenty o'beer"
Do they sell "congrats in losing your virginity!" cards and do they come in gay?
He told me that when he bends me over that chair I remind him of a bull rider. So thanks for being the ex that helps my present sex life
You -do- realize there are other things to talk about than just how different parts of you smell like pussy, right?
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