Holy cold harsh reality of sobriety batman
After she swallowed she let out a hurge burp. No BS. I'm the cock of the walk.
I think you have the wrong number. But at any rate, respect.
I saw an Asian dude carrying a patchwork denim purse get into a car with two rednecks at the grocery store tonight. Imagine what I could have seen if I had actually done something interesting.
Maybe my heart is located in my vagina
you kept naming everything at the party...like "boy i'm going to make out with" and "table i'm going to dance on later"
So there is a guy driving a robot around the college of engineering selling energy drinks
porn star boner night. come get it.
Some guy just delivered flowers to my roommate cause he fell off a roof onto her at a party last night. I think they have a date tomorrow.
He asked me if we could throw a lingerie party together so I guess he's single again
I mean it was his birthday. How was I supposed to tell him he could not wear a sombrero while we bang.
FridayRule: If it takes you longer than 5 minutes to find a parking spot, you don't have class today
Good because ass is like 60% of my diet now
Good. Sleepy. In the middle of a pregnancy scare. The usual.
Every time Brady gets sacked I cum a little...
You are a genius and a whore.
Randomize