So I'm stoned for 420, and have an eye doctor appointment in fifteen minutes
Are your eyes okay
I mean if I was Asian they would be
dude i just saw the hottest 13 year old but she was kinda ghetto.
can we get nightvision for the apartment?
it was the least impressive dick i've ever seen... and i've changed babies' diapers.
How did the whale quest end up? I saw u hit a little snag when the first one heard you call her that.
Don't let the fact that shes seen my penis discourage you
I walked in and she was kneeling on the ground with no pants on, throwing up, and holding the puppy. It was one of those moments, where i was like damn i wish i had my camera.
Were you paying girls to come up and grab my cock and tell me I look like bradley Cooper?
She's drinking vodka out of a windex bottle. She is spraying it in her mouth and at strangers.
In order to see him, he made me facetime with his penis, which he had drawn a smile face on. Getting laid shouldn't be this difficult.
I felt so bad but my urge to be with you & drunkenly eat your face was apparently much stronger.
just walked across campus with a bottle of champagne in between my boobs. night two and the quest for classiness is already over
I got really upset about missing him last night when I was demonstrating penis sizes of the people I've slept with using a tape measurer to my roommates
She climbed up the stairs with three brownies in one fist, two in the other, and one in her mouth. Also, she opened the bedroom door with her foot. I may be in love.
I feel so accomplished. I've cleaned my room, done laundry, called those places, gotten jobs, and masturbated.
I'm so proud of you.
Randomize
