we ended up doing shots out of those medicine cups..swine flu finally did something good for me
he fucked me so hard my future children felt it
It's almost summer. We need to start reconnecting with our home drug dealers.
Having skype sex with him in the lounge at 1:45am...THIS IS WHAT HE DOES TO ME
dizzyuy bat. 3.453 lkos. hoit sx, now im single. blackouteed
Fuck. The basement bathroom I've been getting head in for 6 months just went 'Out of Service'.
I feel like I just rode a horse, did a million jumping jacks, ran a marathon and need a carton on cigarettes. best sex hands down... EVER
I found your doppelganger. same hair, eyes, personality, catch phrases, and penis. it was mind-boggeling.
ask me again when I'm sobewr aka tuesday
I'm sure we could make a ball of yarn and a nickel into a drinking game
How do I feel about a girl who has a g string tattooed on
The only people in the library at 5:00 on the friday after finals are homeless or pre-med.
A man just sang Jennifer Lopez to me out his car window. I am not sure how I feel about this, but it is not positively.
Why is everyone giving me a hard time for drinking?!
Your in the library.
hurry up. it's a friday night and i'm drinking in my office by myself. wearing a stewie griffin costume. the cleaning lady is judging me.
Randomize
