We drank from noon till 5 am, there was adderall and nice jews involved it was just crazy
Party at my house. Liquor pinata. Your presence is required.
They let you pick the name that they announce for you at graduation. The professional world needs to prepare itself for papa smurf mcdonald.
Absence makes the cock grow harder.
Remember that amazing deer? You peed next to that dear..
I wonder if you can snort coke upside down
she just came into my room, drunkenly shoved six dollars into my bra and told me to spend it on chicken wings.
she has like 12 pairs of underwear people left at her house from the other night
They didn't have a "sorry I was late for your birthday party because I was getting arrested" card.
Can we just discuss how hundreds of miles away we were both beyond drunk and in some boys bed. That is the definition of friendship.
But that background check said 51...Omg. If I hooked up with someone that's my dads age.....
So I've been in more fights on one leg than I've had on two.
i fell into a bathtub last night and broke the fall with my forehead. my forehead is bruised
There's a big difference between a penis and a toilet.
Call me Sherlock Holmes, bitch.
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