Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
She has 2500 facebook friends. I probably should have used a condom.
If we were unicorns we would fly together. Like in a pack. A pack of flying unicorns.
Nah you can have him. There's too many men in my life right now. I can't handle another dick.
New handbag passed the ultimate test. The walk of shame. I had a bra, tights, skirt, shirt & sweater in it and you couldn't tell. yessss.
After throwing up in a tequila bottle on my nightstand (still not sure how she did that) she asked if she could slip into something more comfortable.
If I go there, please come with. It will accelerate the lesbian rumor but be totally worth it.
A beer fell out of the case, hit the ground and started spraying. He's a pro. He grabbed it and shotgunned it while still holding the case.
Okay. But I hope it isn't expensive lingerie. Because I'm ripping it off Hulk Hogan style.
My chin is breaking out a bit and feels all itchy and burny like I'm allergic to something. Are you using a new lotion on your balls?
Below this exterior of ice is a layer of cum. Followed by a pool of gin. More cum. Then, finally a heart.
We were fucking and his phone rang and it was his grandma. He just had a conversation with his grandma while fucking me from behind. Then his dad called and asked him what he wanted from taco bell.
Named all the presidents in order between puke sessions while semi conscious so that's a thing I can do now
IT'S A GIANT FUCKING ROBOT, DUDE. LOGIC IS OUT OF THE QUESTION BECAUSE AWESOME.
This may be the most redneck thing I've ever said, but I know all there is to know about farting dogs
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