Free body shot off of Sarah. Expires never.
I think I might.. possibly.. like a Justin Bieber song.
I think you might... possibly... have sprouted a vagina.
What's the protocol on showing a video of me sucking the life out of my ex in order to prove beyond a doubt that I give great head???
Honestly, I don't care if the only reason she gave me her beer was because she was bisexual and wanted to touch my vagina. Beer is beer.
I think you blew it when you asked her "Do you look good naked too, Or is it just the bra?"
I literally just wielded a katana to save a child's life. What did you do today?
Last time i was there we saw the window of the pizza place we were at get busted, we were pulled out of a taxi to be questioned by the cops, and we peed outside a waffle house. I'm in.
i know i should keep better track of the things that i put in your vagina but i've put so many things in there it's hard to keep track
Please tell me you aren't concussed from dancing on the stripper pole
2:23 am. Im just at McDonalds, in my pajamas, at 2 am, paying in nickles, cuz thats how i roll.
2:26 am. Im just being thrown out of McDonalds, in my pajamas, at 2 am, without my nickles, cuz thats how i roll.
You're about to makeout with my vagina, I don't think she cares that you haven't brushed your teeth. Just get over here!
I just wish I had a snapshot of his attempted front flip off the bar. There are some things that are worth getting a life ban for, and the moment of impact with his foot and that lady's face was one of those things.
She may be more beautiful than I am, but I bet she hasnt pissed in as many public places as me...
Weirdest drunk sex ever. His sweat dripped into my eyeball and then he looked down and asked me why I was crying. I went with it.
We are literally scheduling phone sex... if that's not long distance af then i don't know what is
Randomize
