can you please tell me why I'm bleeding so heavily from my ass and all my makeup is gone?
my hot student got the clitoris wrong on the lab practical...so it kinda makes me not want to pursue it
just because he can't find it on a cat, doesn't mean he can't find it on you
Just learned the hard way that dicks can bruise the back of your throat to the extent that you cant eat. You're dead to me.
he somehow instantly knew i was from vermont.
it probably had something to do with chasing your soco with maply syrup.
He has horses apparently. I wonder if we could fuck while riding a horse or if that's too dangerous.
i still can't believe we survived that barcrawl. the third bar had bullet holes and we still went in.
It's not my fault you have a job and can't get drunk on Tuesday's. Don't take your frustrations out on me!
This girl came outta nowhere yelling HOLD MY DICKKKKKK!
Jesus Christ that hit just spoke to so many levels of my soul. It's caressing them softly
You're like Jane Goodall in a forest of gay men. Someday your autobiography will be called "Bottoms in the Mist".
As the cops are taking us away I see the strippers taking our DD backstage.
All I'm sayin is that I don't want to raise anything. Or deal with anything. Or having anything come out of my vagina. I mean, I don't think that's asking too much.
Oh god it's open bar.
My hands smell like penis... I can't even remember the last time i touched a penis, but my hands say i did. Oh the mystery.
These random guys found me. They told me not to wander in the woods and i remember saying 'am i fucking Bambi?! I'm not gonna walk into woods!' then i threw up.
Randomize
