Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
i live my life in a constant state of hangover.
now that im off birth control, the world is a much scarier place
Thats the worst face I've ever seen you make an I've seen you throw up in your own hair.
I thanked her dad for "firing off a good one" when she was conceived. She said thats why he doesnt like me.
You take your time. Wallowing in last nights filth is the best way to get over a hangover
Grandma can hear your bong from the living room, please be more quiet. Love mom.
He would have to make magical things happen in my nether regions to actually make me vote republican.
Im about to smoke a huge bowl. My penis is so happy. Who needs girls.
The cop left me alone after I gave her my spare snow cone. It was a hot and humid day and that uniform looked stuffy. Yay stoner me for overindulging in icy treats.
What kind of present accurately says to my male suitemate "I'm sorry that I accidentally flashed you my vagina while I was super drunk"?
Also topless tea is a thing that happens in our apartment. Ready yourself.
Fun fact. I just wrapped myself in wrapping paper for a sext. Is this a new high or a new low stay tuned.
This may sound strange but do you have my pants?
You tried to trade them for some girls skirt... So she has them...
HER BOYFRIEND CAME HOME WHILE WE WERE GETTING IT ON IN THE SHOWER
At least you smelled nice while he kicked your ass.
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