I think I'm going to be in trouble for sneaking out last night. My Dad saw me drive up this morning when he was leaving early for work.
What'd you say?
I told him I was sleep driving
nothing can go wrong this weekend. $1500 to spend. i have options for hookups every night. my backup plans have backup plans
I'm heating up a hotdog using a candle.
Drinking with a woman who gave an anti-drugs speech at my high school. Somehow, not surprised.
You're a college freshman. Its your job to be pathetic. And drunk. But mostly pathetic
My mouth feels like I've been chewing on leather and firecrackers for the past 3 days
I took my exam the next day still drunk and failed, but I kno for a fact that I filled in the bubbles for my name perfectly
The pigeons can smell the fear
Wtf
We decided to try to steal hot dogs but it ended up with me punching him in the face and crying. Pretty solid night
I sign my lease Thursday, I'm about to be released back into the wild.
I'll make missing person signs.
You're a good friend.
Hypothetically speaking, at what point does fire become too much fire?
Also, do you have any insight as to WHY I have a note saved from the 17th of June that reads *clears throat*, "you got that swanky blues libido"
FUCK YOU IM DRINKING WINE FROM A BOX
You okay there or need a ride? Maybe a straw for your box
Maybe a straw...
A friendship for the ages born on how horny we both are
thanks for supporting my whoreish tendencies
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